Silly write up by me. Started writing in Reading when I was all alone in my studio apartment for almost 10 months! But today I decided to complete this bit even though I wan't sure if I could do full justice to it. Apologies if I've strayed towards the end.
I thought of being a bit more general and hence it's only in a male reference as in most cases.
Love's a funny thing. You expect it to be easy. You expect it to be a world of roses and laughters and perfect moments that you would find only in movies. You expect him to always say the right thing, and always know exactly how you feel, or exactly how to react to it. You expect him to calm you down when you’re yelling or to chase you when you're running away. You expect so much that you feel entirely, and utterly defeated when something doesn’t exactly match up with all your plans.
But that’s the thing. Love isn’t a plan. It doesn’t have a certain beginning and it certainly has no end or visible finish line to those deeply in it. Love happens; it is so incredibly messy. People around you can’t comprehend why you do the things you do, or why you fight so hard for something that seems to cause you so much pain, because simply, they can’t see. They can’t see the invisible cloak of insanity that surrounds you when you’re in love. It’s inconvenient and painful and devastating at times, but we can’t live without it.
What you don’t learn is how hard love is. How much work it takes. How much of ourselves we have to put into it. How it isn’t worth it until we are complete and utter idiots about it. Love isn’t him calming you down when you yell. It’s him yelling, just as loud, just as hard, right back at you, right in your face to wake you up and keep you grounded. It isn’t him bringing you roses everyday or cute things that make your relationship appear more presentable. It’s after a long fight, that drains the bones right out of you both, and yet him showing up at your door the next morning anyway. It’s not him saying all the right things or knowing exactly how to handle you.
So no, it’s not him caressing your hair and telling you everything is going to be alright. It’s him standing there, admitting he’s just as scared as you are. You have to remember that with love, you’re not the only one involved. You’ve unknowingly put your life, your heart into the palms of another persons hands, and said, "Here. Do what you will. Mash it into mince meat. Or forget I ever handed it to you. As long as you have it. It makes us crazy. It makes reality invisible and it erases all the lines that we shouldn’t cross. Because love isn’t about fencing ourselves in; feeling safe, feeling sure about the future."
It’s about scaring the shit out of every nerve in our body, but pushing forward anyway. Because all the fighting and all the tears and all the uncertainty is worth it. And it’s a hell of a lot better, than being 100% happy all the time, without someone to show us that there is a world of a difference between feeling ‘happy’ and feeling whole.
And yet, today there is a lot of deceit and betrayal in every love. Rare is an occasion when love glues two together firmly. Look around and you can see a lot of broken hearts. Some who once were deeply in love are today scared to fall into the trap once again. Not because they are scared of what happens or if it works out again or not. Only because, they don't want to suffer the plight once again. Even if they do, they aren't sure of the other person is feeling the same way.
Vinay
25-08-2012
19:10 IST
I thought of being a bit more general and hence it's only in a male reference as in most cases.
Love's a funny thing. You expect it to be easy. You expect it to be a world of roses and laughters and perfect moments that you would find only in movies. You expect him to always say the right thing, and always know exactly how you feel, or exactly how to react to it. You expect him to calm you down when you’re yelling or to chase you when you're running away. You expect so much that you feel entirely, and utterly defeated when something doesn’t exactly match up with all your plans.
But that’s the thing. Love isn’t a plan. It doesn’t have a certain beginning and it certainly has no end or visible finish line to those deeply in it. Love happens; it is so incredibly messy. People around you can’t comprehend why you do the things you do, or why you fight so hard for something that seems to cause you so much pain, because simply, they can’t see. They can’t see the invisible cloak of insanity that surrounds you when you’re in love. It’s inconvenient and painful and devastating at times, but we can’t live without it.
What you don’t learn is how hard love is. How much work it takes. How much of ourselves we have to put into it. How it isn’t worth it until we are complete and utter idiots about it. Love isn’t him calming you down when you yell. It’s him yelling, just as loud, just as hard, right back at you, right in your face to wake you up and keep you grounded. It isn’t him bringing you roses everyday or cute things that make your relationship appear more presentable. It’s after a long fight, that drains the bones right out of you both, and yet him showing up at your door the next morning anyway. It’s not him saying all the right things or knowing exactly how to handle you.
So no, it’s not him caressing your hair and telling you everything is going to be alright. It’s him standing there, admitting he’s just as scared as you are. You have to remember that with love, you’re not the only one involved. You’ve unknowingly put your life, your heart into the palms of another persons hands, and said, "Here. Do what you will. Mash it into mince meat. Or forget I ever handed it to you. As long as you have it. It makes us crazy. It makes reality invisible and it erases all the lines that we shouldn’t cross. Because love isn’t about fencing ourselves in; feeling safe, feeling sure about the future."
It’s about scaring the shit out of every nerve in our body, but pushing forward anyway. Because all the fighting and all the tears and all the uncertainty is worth it. And it’s a hell of a lot better, than being 100% happy all the time, without someone to show us that there is a world of a difference between feeling ‘happy’ and feeling whole.
And yet, today there is a lot of deceit and betrayal in every love. Rare is an occasion when love glues two together firmly. Look around and you can see a lot of broken hearts. Some who once were deeply in love are today scared to fall into the trap once again. Not because they are scared of what happens or if it works out again or not. Only because, they don't want to suffer the plight once again. Even if they do, they aren't sure of the other person is feeling the same way.
Vinay
25-08-2012
19:10 IST
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